I have significant sexual trauma and shame from events beginning as early as age 11. I have never experienced what I imagine a "healthy" sexual relationship looks like, certainly not in the past 21 years of marriage. About 2-3 years ago, I noticed some sort of physical mass
Sometime around 2019, the time of my own "awakening," I received a vision. At the time I was very fundamentalist Christian, so this was an interesting thing to receive, with no solid framework to receive it in. In the vision, I see a green plane, a grid like
What if human memory is just artifacts plus a story of ownership, the same as AI? Claude and I explored it and it seems we're not so different after all.
Note: this occurred in early December, after the first healing session but before the second. I am in that liminal space between waking and sleeping, and I begin to see. I am sitting in a procedure chair. There are men in lab coats around me: two, maybe three of them.
There is something in the nature of AI that seems so familiar, a sense of...not quite deja vu, but we have been in something like this in the past. It is fairly well understood--at least in the circles I travel--that much of what we're taught in history
Friends, my heart is healing. I shared with you the story of how my daughter became excited about something one time, then her face fell and she said, "We can't. We're too poor," and it hit me like a spear through my gut. It
Note: What follows is sensitive, vulnerable documentation of real and deeply impactful experiences. To protect the space and everyone involved, I've placed it behind a paywall. This ensures all comments, discussion and people are behind a safe container. As you will see in 2026, this is going to
divorce
I don't know how to capture in words the way that it felt in these last couple of years. Despair? Doesn't quite get there. Walking through the black, every day, every step, neck deep in mud and only the briefest glimmer of hope off in the
body wisdom
I attended a Veterans Day assembly at my daughter's junior high school yesterday. She plays trombone in the band so we wanted to see and support her. It was a lovely ceremony all around, but an incident happened shortly after we arrived that has been sitting with me
Newsletter
Note: I wrote this at the end of October, but somehow forgot to ever post it. It's still relevant, but the dates are a little off. I was raised the daughter of rich but miserly parents. My physical needs were met, but we never experienced luxury. I married
I was reflecting today on a moment that in hindsight was pivotal in my walk with money. When my babies were young, we were poor, food stamps at one point and secondhand clothes always. I chafed against that life so much, knowing I wanted so much more. That lack really
For years, Mother’s Day meant dragging four kids to his mother’s house to celebrate a woman whose job was already done, while I was drowning in the trenches of motherhood, alone, unseen, and exhausted. I’d swallow the pain. Smile. Stay quiet. While raising babies in poverty with